Skip to main content

New Start

By
Last year I was proud of my body now Im back to lights out when I get ready again. I feel like all my hard work went out the window for nothing all because of this quarantine I feel sad and depressed like I'll never get it back this isn't like me I always have the perseverance to have a new goal but I was going somewhere now I feel like I'm starting almost all over again. I put on my shirt that I've worn for years that I used to swim in now is almost too tight, for an interview yesrtday almost brought me to tears . I signed back up with my trainer and started back at the gym its now open . Being out of the gym 3 months its hard now im weak and slow i used to be fast and strong and efficiant.I feel like I failed myself. People say who cares , I care! I was deticated and I worked hard. So here I am starting from scratch. on the record it sucks .

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Heart Of The Matter

By
My heart you see something is wrong with it and after several stays in the hospital, many near death experiences, doctors telling me I need surgery all they can tell me is my heart beats to fast sometimes and it pumps blood wrong. I carry pills every where I go Incase it beats to fast. I cut my sugar, my carbs, but it’s not enough. Running has been the one thing that has kept my heart rate low. I self conditioned my heart and taught it to beat at certain rate as I run. But if I miss running for just a mere few days my heart is back up again. Sometimes I wonder if my days are numbered if I will live to see my daughter grow. I pray I do. But God has kept me alive through great tragedies so far. I trust him with my life. Watching and training my heart in this fitness blog I can tell you to believe me when I say running is a life saver. Start walking. I trained my heart by running 2 minutes walking 2 minutes now I run no problem a half hour at a steady heart rate of 150. My heart doctor sa...
Post a Comment
Read more

Playing Out Your Childhood

By
Is he cold or not loving he is playing out childhood wounds he has not gotten help for ? And we put up with it because we were mistreated as children looking for some kind of love? I know I was with an unavailable emotional person. Have you?Here is the answers you need !  Why You’re Still Attracting Unavailable Partners (And How To Stop) By Shelly Bullard Photo: Stocksy This post is part of a series by Shelly Bullard  — a primer on raising your vibration and attracting your soul mate. For the next five days, we’ll post one article offering the foundational elements you need to go deeper in the search for self love, and the love of your life. When you’re ready to take the next step, check out Shelly’s course:   How To Attract A Partner Who’s Ready For Deep, Devoted Love . One of the most common relationship issues is getting stuck in a pattern of choosing unavailable partners. How do you know if that applies to you? If you're attract...
Post a Comment
Read more

2018

By
As I started this journey as I wrote in my first blog post “ The Beginning “ to better myself for myself and then my partner whom I knew I was going to marry this year had so many shifts it happened so fast like a torent storm. I watched the love of my life leave me and for someone else. I saw him through the face of addiction as he begged me to hold on and he abandoned me over and over as my heart slowly became unrecognizable. I became a weak woman who was once strong . I gave him yet another forgiving chance for him to leave again in a numb sweaty picture of addiction leaving me once again cold and empty . I sit here knowing my value in God and as a woman. I thought was it me how did I not measure up ? But my self love came through this time.Isnt that what this journey was about ? It does not matter how many pounds I still need to lose or where my path is going I deserve love. To have my hand held to not be ignored and to have joy. Walk away from situations that are toxic. I started ...
Post a Comment
Read more