Today as I undressed for the shower I notice a huge change in my stomach . I have been down thinking I’ve made zero progress . I’m doing my weekly measurements on the 12th so stay tuned . It’s definitely not coming as fast as it usually does for me . But I’ve given myself a 3 month goal to get into the vicinity of where I used to be . At 3 months I will re asses . Thank you for following my journey . I think the hardest part is as weird as it may sound in being single so many years I’m ready for someone to be in my life . But how does this happen I don’t know . I been alone so long I’m tired of being alone . You know.
It’s 10:57 pm . For the first time I feel total hand over to God at this point. It took 3 years to get here didn’t it. There were parts I was holding back from God like here you go Jesus you can control this but Im holding on to this , sometimes things can anchor you down from the freedom God has for you I don’t know how to teach other people this but I know God wants me to. I had a dream of the love of my life and I would’ve been damned to let that go. I almost died holding on to it. We have things right , things we can’t let go , can’t forgive , or things we hope in . But it’s that twist in fate God wanted me to realize . When we hope in something of the world it will sink us because people will fail us. My hope needed to be in God. Not my love of my life or anything of this world. I got to tell you it was the hardest thing ever to take the thing I loved the most and say here God it’s yours it’s no longer mine . Because you see if something is of God , God will bring it back . ...
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